Burge


 * William Burge **

//Paste the appropriate portion of your essay in the spaces below. Note: we may not have enough time to post every part of your essay even though there are sections for each.//


 * __Thesis Statement:__**

Romeo is fated to make this play become a tragedy; it is his destiny and his set lifestyle from the day he was born. __Comments:__ This is a very good statement, but i feel a thesis should flow better than what you have here. This is a great thesis, it is straight forward, accurate and clear. what more can you ask for?-geeza two words... Great Thesis statment (McGooglez) i like this, very good burge.- chip nice statement-yowell __Fate is talked about a great deal in “Romeo and Juliet” and is seen as the reason and almost an excuse for every bad thing that happens throughout the play.__ One such quote is in the prologue, “A pair of star-crossed lovers take their life” (P.6). First off, this quote gives away the end of the play; the lovers kill themselves. The word pair implies that they are two in one and that they will die together, which is another fate for their demise. One might think that star-crossed means too in love to see, but it actually means they are target of the stars, or fate. The stars have already crossed them out and are honing in on making their lives miserable. Romeo is onto the fact that fate is against him right before the party, and is scared something bad might happen. “I fear too early, for my mind misgives some consequence yet hanging in the stars shall bitterly begin his fearful date” (1.4.106-108). At this point Romeo realizes that the stars are watching over him, and that fate can have him killed and take away his love at any moment in a heart-beat. This sudden revelation leaves him feeling frightened and alone in a vast world ruled by no one. __Comments:__ Very good paragraph. The quotes are good, and the explanations explain the quotes well. **DAVID** Great paragraph. Adjust the citations into the format Mr. D gave us(Act, Scene)-geeza citations needs work (McGooglez) good Quotes you explained well.- $Chip$ good quotes-julian
 * __Body Paragraph 1:__**

__The feud is the part that drives the conflict of the play, and it is fate’s course that two soul mates are set out to be in the middle of it.__ In the prologue the feud is talked about as a foreshadowing of what will come, and by foreshadowing it is shown that this fate will happen. “From ancient grudge break to new mutiny, where civil blood makes civil hands unclean” (P.3-4). The ancient grudge has probably been going on for so long that all have forgotten the meaning of the fighting, but it fate causes the eternal hate and struggle with no rhyme or reason. The mutiny is the two lovers trying to break off of the trend of the feud and moving on to making peace and love, and defying fate does not normally make a great fate for oneself. The term civil in civil blood implies that they are civilians and should not be in the business of fighting, and so the only reason why they would fight is because of fate. In Act 1 the prince gets mad at the Montagues and Capulets for fighting again, and makes a speech about what is to come if they do not make peace and stop fighting. “Your lives shall pay the forfeit of the peace, for this time all the rest depart away” (1.1.88-89). In a nutshell, the prince basically says that if they don’t stop fighting that they will suffer the consequences, and many people will die. This actually comes true when fate takes away the lives of Romeo and Mercutio from the __Capulet friend and family side__, and Juliet, Tybalt, and Paris from the Capulet fiancée and family side. Both sets of parents are left with no one but their servants and cousins, which is fault of their own for not controlling the feud. Fate takes away all that the lords love because they were not strong enough to stop the feud and make justice of their arguments. __Comments:__ the underlined line should be Montague. the paragraph is not connected to the thesis statement. You mention fate, but the feud is the center of the paragraph. **DAVID** agree with david... whats witht eh underlining, also (McGooglez) Stay on the topic your doing man.-chip dont summerize so much-julian
 * __Body Paragraph 2:__**

__The plague is what keeps Romeo and Juliet from spending their lives together, and is caused by Romeo’s “stop the violence” attitude.__ When Romeo acts carefree and in love he makes the mistake of trying to break up a feud with a peaceful aura about him. He ends up getting Mercutio stabbed by holding him back, and causes him to make a speech before death. “A plague a’both houses! I am sped” (3.1.82). Mercutio is obviously very mad that Romeo had the gall to step into another man’s fate, and the Tybalt stabbed him, especially as he is related to the prince. If Romeo had not gotten in the way, he would not have been angered over Mercutio’s death and go chasing after Tybalt, and getting himself banned; a perfect example of fate’s dominoes falling perfectly against each other knocking them all down. The plague is what ends up keeping Romeo from getting the letter, so the plague that Mercutio cursed on him does come true, and fate kills him by setting this all into motion and in perfect place. When Romeo gets banned it is what ends up requiring him the need of the letter that Friar Lawrence attempts to send to him, only he does not get it. “I could not send it - here it is again - nor get a messenger to bring it thee, so fearful were they of infection” (5.2.14-16) Mercutio’s fate on Romeo is hereby fulfilled; the plague keeps him from getting the news of the secret plan. If he had known the plan he would not have gone over the edge and gone off and killed himself, but he did not know and he did exactly that. Friar John could also get no other messenger to send it, alluding to the fact that it is Romeo and Juliet against the world and that nobody wants to help them, putting them up against the judgment of the world, and of course, fate. __Comments:__ I would not start your topic sentence with the plague. This paragraph is very confusing. I would give evidence why Mercutio was only angry at Romeo. Also, I would reword the paragraph to make it clearer. **DAVID** EXACTLY. after a few rereads i understand what youre getting at... reword it, and change the topic/first sentence (McGooglez) Ok i get it now, nice this is good.- chip relate back to thesis more-julian
 * Body Paragraph 3:**

__The death of Romeo is a result of many things, but from the beginning the source is identified as fate.__ A great deal of troubles and misfortunes fall upon Romeo unexpectedly, and there are three categories that cover them. Fate in general is Romeo’s biggest problem, because it is not something that he can change consciously. The feud is also an act of fate as he was born into a family and had no choice. The plague also fated him to not receive a crucial message and go off killing himself, so it is another case of cursed fate and misfortune that it struck in the wrong place at the wrong time. Romeo is fated to make this play become a tragedy; it is his destiny and his set lifestyle from the day he was born.
 * __Intro:__**

__Comments:__ What is the plauge? Is it the black plague? Otherwise, the intro is fine. **DAVID Nice paragraph, maybe go into more detail about the plague, seemed shallow (McGooglez) Good job burge.- chip Nice description things. (KD)

__Conclusion:__** __The fate of being born into a rival household catches up to Romeo as it takes his life, partly his fault, partly others, organized by fate.__ It was him against the intangible force that makes the world spin and that keeps order to the universe; controlled chaos. Many would think that Romeo’s greatest enemy in the play was the Capulet family, which is a misleading thought. Yes, the Capulet’s feud hurts him, but in the end only fate’s cold touch ends up being his demise. __Ends up making a classic into a tragedy. Ends up making one wonder if we have any control over our actions, and whether we can fight and be ourselves.__ __Comments:__ The grammar in the last two sentences makes them confusing. Also, you never talked about the Capulets before. **DAVID** DANG... good conclusion. nice i like the big words, but grammar is a minor problem. (McGooglez) Some parts sound like you're contradicting yourself- like the feud. (KD)

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