Calhoun


 * Reid Calhoun **

//Paste the appropriate portion of your essay in the spaces below. Note: we may not have enough time to post every part of your essay even though there are sections for each.//

Romeo was killed due to many people. The main person to blame for Romeo’s death was Friar Lawrence because he was in charge of the whole marriage and the plan to put Romeo together in the end. Tybalt is also to blame since he is the reason Romeo was sent away from everyone. __Comments:__ This is a great thesis statement. You need to mention the third person who is to blame and it would be good to try to wrap them all under one theme- Henry Quillian It would be better if you put more reason for Tybalt and F.L's responsibility, as it is very limited right now. If Mercutio is to blame the you need to include him in the thesis statement. -Tripp H'Doubler If you had to blame one person for Romeo’s death, it would be Friar Lawrence for sure. He even had a bad attitude about their love. “These violent delights have violent ends (2.6.9).” Maybe if he said violent delights continue forever in a sea of love, the couple would be in a sea of love forever and everyone would be happy. No, Friar Lawrence had to doom the couple from the beginning. It turns out that their violent love ended in a violent end. Friar Lawrence tried to make the love work, but it didn’t turn out so good. He devised a plan that involved death and fate. “Take thou this vial, being then in bed, and this distilling liquor drink thou off (4.1.93-94).” This plan ended up in Romeo thinking Juliet was dead, so he killed himself. Then Juliet found Romeo dead, and she killed herself. __Comments:__ I have to say your point after your first quote is quite amusing. possibly connect quotes to thesis more and explain more.-HQ
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Try to talk more formally. It seems like I am talking to you in a conversation. In other words, don't write how you think. -TH'D

Tybalt is also a man to blame for Romeo’s death. He was a big part of the brawls that happened between the Montagues and the Capulets. Tybalt doesn’t like Romeo at all and he wants to fight Romeo to teach him a lesson. “Romeo, the love I can bear thee can afford no better term than this: thou art a villain (3.1.53-54).” Tybalt is truly mad at Romeo and he hates him as a person. Tybalts’ rage leads to his death which then leads to Romeo’s banishment. Romeo’s banishment keeps him from seeing Juliet which leads to his death. “Thou wretched boy, that didst consort him here, shalt with him hence (3.1.121-122).” These are Tybalt’s last words before he dies. This is how Romeo got banished and Romeo ended up killing himself. __Comments:__ interesting but needs more argument to it rather than just stating facts.-HQ
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The last person that is to blame for Romeo’s death is Mercutio. He put a curse on both houses which lead to Romeo’s death. “A plague a’both houses! I am sped. Is he gone and hath nothing (3.1.82-83).” Mercutio plagued the Montagues and the Capulets. This caused them to fight even more and kill each other. Mercutio indirectly killed Romeo from the beginning. He wanted Romeo to crash the Capulet Party. “Nay, gentle Romeo, we must have you dance (1.4.13).” Romeo went to the Capulet party which made Tybalt really mad. This caused Tybalt to kill Mercutio which caused Romeo to kill Tybalt. Romeo killing Tybalt lead to Romeo getting banned from his town. This caused Romeo to find Juliet “dead” and to kill himself. __Comments:__ Well its an interseting chain of events. this is probably your strongest paragraph. I recomend tying all your paragraphs under the theme of fate to help connect them.-HQ
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Many things lead to Romeo’s death, whether it was indirectly, or directly. __Comments:__ Well... thats true...-HQ
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Many things lead to Romeo’s death, whether it was indirectly, or directly. Whether it is Friar Lawrence being an idiot, or Mercutio wanting Romeo to be happy and find his love, Romeo ended up dying because of his friends. Romeo did make some mistakes by trusting these “friends”, but that’s what makes this story so interesting and such a classic. __Comments:__ great conclusion Include Tybalt into your conclusion-HQ
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I really like the conclusion.-Tripp H'Doubler

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